Happy Galentine’s Day

Posted on February 13, 2024 by The Bellissimo Files

Galentine’s Day is a recent phenomenon. Amy Poehler’s Parks and Recreation character, Leslie Knope, made it up in 2010. I know that we don’t have to wait until February 13 to celebrate our girlfriends, we can do that any time we like, but today I am going to shout about my chosen sisters.

In an episode of Sex And the City, after Aidan breaks up with Carrie, at Charlotte’s wedding, Carrie says, “It’s hard to find people who would love you no matter what. I was lucky enough to find three of them.”

I cry every time I hear that line because I, like Carrie, have been lucky enough to find “four of them”. Four girlfriends who love each other no matter what – even when we piss each other off, our opinions differ, or, even when I move to the other side of the world.

I have lived away from my girls for over 17 years now. You would think at this stage I would feel less connected to them but this couldn’t be further from the truth. As the months and years go by, my love for them, and our bond, gets even stronger – they become even more important in my life. My (chosen) sisters are the first people I call when I have the best news and are also the first ones I turn to when things aren’t so great.

Thanks to technology we are in constant contact. We talk about everything and anything (I really hope no-one else gets their hands on these conversations!). In one conversation we could go from talking about a work/life frustration, to cracking each other up, to discussing our fears and planning new adventures.

I have always struggled to understand when people say they grew apart from their girlfriends when partners and kids came into the equation. I don’t get it. Why would you want to give up someone who enriches your life like nothing or no-one else can? Why wouldn’t you want your partner and/or children having these phenomenal women in their lives too? Kids have come into our lives in different ways and at different times – nieces, nephews, daughters, and sons. Instead of tearing us apart, these little spawns of ours have brought us even closer. Besides mum and dad, they have four other girls ready to step in and be there for them in any way needed.

Why would you want to give up people who make you feel strong; push you out of your comfort zone; are in your corner and will even get into that ring for you if need be; call you out when necessary (harsh truths aren’t always easy to hear but are just as important as the celebrations and the compliments); allow you to be an integral part of their lives; go on magnificent adventures together; make each other laugh so hard that you pee a little; hold you or just sit in silence in the tough times; and be each other’s anchors?

Why would you give up people who are good for your soul; who make you a better person; and who make your world a better place to be in? I know I wouldn’t want to and luckily I haven’t had to.

One of the lines that has always resonated with me, since the first time I heard it in Moulin Rouge, is, “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is to love and be loved in return.” There really is nothing like the love of, and for, a girlfriend.

I miss being with my girls like crazy (it’s been 7 years since we were all, physically, in the same place at the same time) but am so thankful that I have them in my life. I know that no matter how far apart we are, or how our lives may change, our sisterhood is something that never will.

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Can Give It But Can’t Take It

Posted on September 29, 2023 by The Bellissimo Files

Thanks to Jigsaw, a youth mental health charity, today is Ireland’s first ever “National Compliment Day”.

Research shows a compliment lifts the mood of both the person receiving it and the person giving it.

As corny as this sounds, I love giving compliments.  It can make someone feel good but more often than not, it is also a lift to my day. The compliment I have given usually comes as a result of something that person has said, or done, which has in turn put a smile on my face, or made me feel good.

I love the idea of this day but the thing is, it is not giving compliments that I need help with, it is accepting them that I find a problem.

When a compliment is given to me, I feel a bit like Wonder Woman, in that I metaphorically feel my wrists go up and I am flinging the compliment off of me, like she does bullets. My toes also start to curl, my face goes pink and my mouth is blasting off all of the reasons why that compliment should be directed elsewhere.

I know it’s odd to say this, given the career I’ve chosen, but I don’t like being in the spotlight. I like shining the light on others (maybe it does make a little sense as I love being the interviewer, not the person being interviewed). Taking a compliment feels just like that I suppose, like I am under the spotlight. Does that mean I think I don’t deserve the spotlight? Not necessarily, but, sometimes it does make me feel uncomfortable.

I have always been good at taking on criticisms, or “harsh realities”, but taking a compliment seems to knock me about. I think this has something to do with growing up with brothers who were always quick to throw about the “banter” so I never dared get “a big head”. This “banter” had me develop a thick skin. I always thought this was good training for the real world. Thing is, as a result, I now I have the thickest skin. So thick that even compliments struggle to get in!

I love watching my twelve year old daughter taking a compliment. She never baulks at it. She never tries to pass it onto someone else. She merely accepts it. Her response is either, “thank you” or “I know right” and she feels so good about this interaction.

In days gone by, she would have been told not to be so egotistical. Deflect that. But accepting a compliment has nothing to do with ego. She is just allowing herself to shine and soak up that sparkle.

So on this compliment day, let’s not only give the compliment. Allow yourself to take it; feel it; and say thank you.

  • – Sarina Bellissimo
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The Blues Can Bring Such Joy

Posted on September 14, 2023 by The Bellissimo Files

I have never been more homesick than last Friday when my AFL football team, Carlton, made it back into the September Finals race for the first time in 10 years.

As I was walking my 7 year old to school, in my Carlton jumper (the one I wore to every match, final, and ultimately winning Grand Final, in 1995) all I kept thinking was I wanted to be wearing this top and walking into the MCG with the other 92,026 – including many of my friends and family.

There is nothing like walking into the “G” in September. That electricity in the air as everyone walks through the turnstiles to get to their seats.

The excitement and hope building as the banners are raised and the teams run onto the field and through those banners, as all of the Carlton supporters start singing/screaming our club song in unison – “Da Da ra da da; da da ra da da; da da ra da da da ra ra, We are the navy blues … “

Singing the national anthem and screaming out that “Go Blues” as soon as the last word of the song has been sung. The power and emotion behind all of that singing and shouting always brings shivers to my spine.

There’s the thrill of the opening siren and that first bounce of the ball. At this stage, the game is still anyone’s. We could actually win this!

I miss experiencing all of that with my friends and family. For a few hours, last Friday morning (Irish time),  I had never felt both so far away and yet so one with everyone back home.

I couldn’t get a video stream of the match but the Triple M radio feed was incredible (Triple M really does Rock Football). The crowd’s emotion was bursting through those speakers and I felt one with them. I felt the joy of getting in the lead; the anxiousness of staying in front; the desperation of wanting that final siren to sound so that Sydney wouldn’t kick another goal and possibly walk away with the win; and then, that deafening roar of the crowd when the siren went off and the realisation that the Baggers managed to do it, and we all live to fight another week in the hope of being there on that one day in September!

As soon as the match was over, my phone was hopping. Friends and family, all of us texting each other about how we managed our nerves – which were now shot; the ecstasy we were all feeling; our takes on the game; videos of packed trains with happy Carlton supporters still singing at the top of their lungs; and talk turned to how to get tickets next week.

As I said, I have never felt further away from home and yet so close and that’s all because of footy. I forgot the power of it. Carlton’s motto this finals season is “Stronger Together”. I know I am gushing, and it sounds mad, because at the end of the day it’s just a sport – but you see, it’s not. It’s about feeling a sense of community, passion, love and connection. And it’s more than just that collective love and emotion you feel with the fellow supporters. It’s that shared elation and joy that I had with my loved ones back home. For a few hours, we were all having the same emotions, even if we were thousands of kilometres apart.

I can’t wait to put my jumper back on and feel this all over again in the morning (or if you’re reading this in Australia, tonight) – Go Blues!

  • – Sarina Bellissimo
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A Summer Of Going Back To Move Forward (I Remember Me)

Posted on September 7, 2023 by The Bellissimo Files

I know it’s September, which means we’re officially in Autumn, but the gorgeous, summer like, weather this week has me holding onto summer for as long as I can. You see, this summer has been a great one – it’s everything I was hoping for and I am finding it hard to say goodbye to it.

I went into summer filled with excitement and anticipation. It was going to be jam packed with many, long overdue, reunions. I knew I was in for some fun times, adventure and lots of love, but never did I think it would be a summer of rediscovery.

For the past year or so I have felt a little ‘meh’. I was in a funk. Don’t get me wrong, I was happy and enjoying each day for the little (and sometimes big) moments of joy that came with it, but, something was missing. There were moments where I just couldn’t find my mojo.

This summer, something shifted and I discovered that what I was missing was my spark. I didn’t get that that’s what it was until I felt it come back.

By hanging out with my family (both blood and chosen), I remembered who I was. It wasn’t a purposeful search – it just happened. In talking about shared memories; our childhoods; people and places we all knew; not having to explain myself – I realised this was something I was missing. That short cut language you have with people you have known forever. I spent a summer using that language and the more I did, the more I felt like a flower coming into bloom.

I realised I was “Sarine” – both in name and in mind. I was their (mad) Sarine/Sar/Sarina. Belly laughs were had about things that usually just go misunderstood (over here); we could annoy each other but then also love each other, so fiercely, at the same time.

Living away from home, you don’t even realize that you have put up a protective wall around your heart. Not to keep others out but to make sure you don’t always long for the people and times that you can not have. You can not go around being homesick for the people you are not with all of the time – it would break you. Yes we are in very frequent contact (voice notes, text messages, phone calls, video calls, and any other way that technology will allow) but there is nothing like the human touch and being in each other’s company. This summer, there was lots of that.

We got to do the simple things like go for walks together; go shopping; see a movie together at the cinema; have an Italian style dinner in my home; long chats on the couch – my couch, in my house; hang out with my kids and make memories with them. We also got to do some incredible bucket list things too. It was all so precious and wonderful.

I have been on such a high for the past three months. Even after the tearful goodbyes, my spark has remained. I have been so used to going without for so long, that I thought I could just keep going but sometimes, if you’re lucky enough, you don’t have to.

Here’s to that spark and the people who remind us of it, and, help lead us right back to ourselves.

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More Than Words – My Big Fat Greek Emotions

Posted on September 4, 2023 by The Bellissimo Files

This weekend sees Nia Vardalos’ bring My Big Fat Greek Wedding (3) back to the cinema.There is a review embargo so I cannot say anything about the film itself, for a few more days. One thing I can say is that watching this film had me reconnecting, and falling back in love, with my heritage and the richness of it. From the beauty of the country, to the amazing gastronomical feasts, their love of family, and especially, to their beautiful use of words and emotion.

The Greek vocabulary is so full and expressive. English feels so bland after hearing a conversation between Greek people (although it is often said in the franchise,  “Give me a word, any word, and I show you that the root of that word is Greek.”).

My favourite conversations between Greek people is when they are exchanging wishes for each other. Like the Greeks themselves, the expressions used are so passionate and full of love, wonder and awe. You can’t help but leave the exchange with a smile and happy thoughts.

They take some of the most basic greetings like Happy Birthday and turn them into the most gorgeous, heartfelt wishes.

Happy Birthday

“Xronia Polla” – Many years to you

“Na zisis” – Here’s to a long life

“Na ta ekatostisis” – May you love to one hundred.

“Na zisis hillia xronia” – Here’s to 1000 good years

“Oti epithimis” –May you have whatever you want and dream. 

“It’s my family member’s birthday”

Response: “Na ti/ton xerese” (“Celebrate her/him. Here’s to her/his health and her/him bringing happiness to your life”)

Weddings

Wishes for the couple before the ceremony:

“Ee ora ee kale” – Here’s to the marriage being good and lucky

Once the couple are married:

“Seehareeteeria” – Congratulations

“Na Zisete” – Long may you live in happiness, love, and joy.

Births

“Na sas Zisi” – Here’s to a long and healthy life for your child.

“Yero ke deenato” – Here’s to your child being healthy and strong

Condolences

“Silipitiria” – Condolences

Responses:

“Zoi se sas” (Life to you)

“Zoi se mas” (Life to Us)

“Na zisete na ton/tin thimaste” – May you live and remember him / her!

This world can be a noisy place. Instead of spouting hate, why don’t we take a leaf out of Greek’s books, and wish only the best for those we come across in life.

In the words of the Greeks – “Na Zisame”! (Long may we live in happiness, love and joy!)

My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 is out in cinemas on Friday 8th September.

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First Day of Second Class

Posted on August 31, 2023 by The Bellissimo Files

“I’m too tired! This jumper is itchy. I don’t like the tie.”

“It’s lashing (there was a little bit of rain), why can’t we drive? My legs hurt (when we proceeded to walk). Oooh, look a Tesla!” All of a sudden there is lots of chat.

“L!!!”, calls a friend as he drives by. “Look, there’s H. Hurry mum and dad, I have to catch up to him!”

We get closer to school. He quietens a little and grabs my arm. We walk together.

He takes the corner. He sees his friends. A massive smile comes across his face.

He is about to take off to join his friends. He turns back. He kisses us both and says bye.

His friends all shout his name. He runs towards them – his oversized bag almost falling off of his back.

So much catching up to do. So many changes, yet, they pick up like there were together only yesterday. There’s lots of laughter. Running around the green to burn off the nervous energy.  

Their teacher appears. They instinctively form a line. Their loud voices are now hushed chatter. They follow their teacher into the school grounds. It’s time for Second Class.

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The First Day Of School (Again)

Posted on August 29, 2023 by The Bellissimo Files

Eight years ago our eldest had her very first, first day of school. There were nerves and excitement  (from all of us) as she took her first steps into the unknown without us.

Over the next eight years, there were many other first days of school. With each of them, we all grew more confident. We finally got our head around how the school works; how often she can get away with wearing the school tracksuit before having to wear the actual uniform again;  school lunches (packing the same lunch everyday because you know the boring ham sandwich, apple, cheese, and lentil curls will actually be eaten); what apps need to be downloaded; how much she needs or wants us there; etc.

Today was the first, first day of school, in a long time, where we stepped back into the unknown.

Today was her very first day of high school, or secondary school as I am always being corrected. All of the same questions that we had in Primary School are back – do we really need that piece of the school uniform? What does that mean? I don’t get that? How does that work? and so much more. By next year, we will sort of get it, but for now we are all just going by the seat of our pants – figuring that we will all learn as we need to. Whatever has been forgotten, can be brought into school the next day.

The thing both these first days have in common – besides the endless questions – is that, while we are all navigating it, it isn’t about myself and her dad, it’s about my eldest. This is her journey – her adventure.

As parents, we will always be there with her if she needs us to be, but, this is not our journey, it is hers. We will walk with her, if that’s what she wants, but also stand back as she does her own thing.

She is our daughter but she is not ours. Our dreams and aspirations are not hers and nor do I wish them to be. We want her to dream big and go and chase those dreams wherever they may lead her. We will not hold her back.

Our fears are not her fears. We are here to empower her, not to limit her.

We are so proud of her but her achievements are not ours. They’re hers.

We will always protect her and have her back but she is her own person who is going to leave her own mark on this world.

Many have asked, are you sad that she is going into high school and that she is growing up? No, we are excited. It’s a privilege to see her grow up. She is stepping into her future and we can’t wait to see what she does with it.

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Movie Review: Gran Turismo

Posted on August 18, 2023 by The Bellissimo Files

Gran Turismo is an inspiring true story of a team of underdogs – a struggling, working-class gamer, Jann Mardenborough (Archie Madekwe) a failed former race car driver, Jack Salter (David Harbour), and a Nisaan motorsport exec, Danny (Orlando Bloom) – who risk it all to take on the most elite sport in the world – motor sports

On the whole, It’s not surprising to see who has been cast in Gran Turismo –Archie Medekwe as Jann is great – you just want him to succeed; you’ll have a love hate relationship with his mentor and coach, played by Stranger Things’ David Harbour; I love seeing Djimon Hounsou back on screen as Jaan’s dad; but I am not sure about Orlando Bloom as the motor exec. It feels like I am watching him in his first ever film. That wasn’t the most surprising thing though. That went to seeing Geri Horner (also known as Geri Halliwell) appear as Jann’s mum. She was actually quite good and really went for it when it called for getting emotional. Oh, and Jann himself makes an appearance in this film too. He served as his own stunt double!

Most will be attracted to this movie because it is an unbelievable true story – and that’s what keeps you watching. While the gamer aspects of the film are really cool and the actual motor racing scenes are a lot of fun and can be tense too, this doesn’t always work. It feels to clunky at times, and drawn out. This needed to be 100 mins long rather than over 2 hours

If you do want to check out Gran Turismo, it is playing in cinemas now.

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Movie Review: Spoiler Alert

Posted on August 18, 2023 by The Bellissimo Files

Spoiler Alert is based on Michael Ausiello’s best-selling memoir, “Spoiler Alert: The Hero Dies,” . It tells the story of how Michael and Kit’s relationship is transformed and deepened when Michael falls ill.

Starring The Big Bang Theory’s Jim Parson as Michael, Ben Aldridge as Kit, the legend that is Sally Field as Kit’s Mum, and there’s even a cameo from Queer Eye’s Antoni Porowski, Spoiler Alert is a beautiful film. It is advertised as a romcom but I wouldn’t put it in that category. It’s a gorgeous love story – the love between Michael and Kit and the love between them and Kit’s parents – warts and all.

The clue, as to whether or not there is going to be a happy ending in this film, is in the title, but watching this, I really did hope that Kit would get better and he and Michael would live happily ever after. I shouldn’t have been shocked when Kit did die, but I was and I was a blubbering mess.

Please do not let the sad ending stop you watching this film because it wasn’t all tears, there were many laughs, heartfelt moments, and even frustrations. It is such a gorgeous film that is available to rent on Apple TV now.

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Movie Review: The Beanie Bubble

Posted on August 18, 2023 by The Bellissimo Files

In 90s America a mini stuffed toy craze was taking over the nation.  Those toys were Beanie Babies and at its peak, half of America owned one. People were trading them, selling them for a sweet fortune and there was even a famous divorce case where a judge had to step in and legally split the collection between the former partners. Now Apple TV Plus has gone and made a movie about this obsession. More specifically the man behind it, Ty Warner and the 3 women, Robbie, Maya and Sheila, who grew his idea into the biggest toy craze in history.

Before the movie even starts there is a disclaimer, “There are parts of the truth you just can’t make up. The other bits we did.” I’d say this is more for the actual people involved in this story, rather than us the viewer, as the whole thing seems so mad that I couldn’t split the truth from the made up.

This is a story about a downfall of a vain man-child who couldn’t grow up and also the women who made his dreams possible. It’s also a story about investing in the dumbest of things and it paying off.

The cast bringing this story to life is outstanding and because of them, when the film does slip a little, like when it spans over 10 years but no-one ages, not even the little kids, you stay with it. There’s Zach Galifianakis as the narcist that is Ty; Elizabeth Banks is the brains of the business, Robbie; Succession’s Sarah Snooks plays Ty’s partner Sheila; and Geraldine Viswanathan is the marketing genius, Maya.

There is so much going on in this film, and as a result, sometimes, it feels a little superficial and frustrating but it is interesting, fun, mad and doesn’t overstay it’s welcome by wrapping everything up in just under 2 hours.

The Beanie Bubble is playing at selected cinemas and also streaming now on Apple TV plus.

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